For Jane…

Meet Kevin Arnold, aka Fred Savage. I wanted to marry Kevin when I was 11 years old! He was the epitome of true love and I watched The Wonder Years, one episode after another, truly believing that someday I’ll find a guy who is exactly like Kevin!

Anyway, I grew up, met other boys who were my age, (some were older) and forgot all about the ‘awkward around girls’ Kevin. Few years later, I discovered pictures of what Fred had become! No offense, but Fred, dude, you broke my heart! You should’ve stayed that young! Having said that, I still fancy the character he played. He almost never seemed to fit in with his kind. Always the underdog, you could tell he had a sensitive soul and was likely to grow up into being a multi faceted guy, who loved listening to music, was probably into quirky things, had an actual opinion on American politics and the fate of the Democrats, and perhaps genuinley cared about contributing towards making the world better in whatever way he could. I guess I could skip the part about what Winnie would grow up to be like… I didn’t particularly think too highly of her. Her character just wasn’t strong enough and besides, she always reminded me of Estella from Dickens’ Great Expectations, which some might argue, is a very desirable character in her own way, but they were both too much of a mind job in my opinion! And they didn’t express themselves well enough, which was part of the problem.

And then, a few more years later, I discovered John Mayer. Well, lets say I discovered his music, which led me to discover him. And the more I read about him, the more interesting he seemed. He is a singer/songwriter but there’s so much more to his music. He feels for what he does, and he doesn’t get too caught up either in the mush or in being anti-establishment. He’s an intelligent songwriter and I guess the most attractive thing about him is his conviction to positively influence as many people as possible. He’s a new age artist, with a very very strong online presence, and yet, there’s still something very ‘normal’ about him… He doesn’t seem ‘out of reach’ like most ‘celebrities’ do. And that’s very refreshing. I love his music… And I am incredibly jealous of his lifestyle! He manages to do everything that I’ve always ALWAYS wanted to do! I hate him for that! I’d love to meet him because, well, I just feel he will have a lot of interesting things to say! He is good looking… but I don’t think it’s a ‘crazy about celebrities’ thing for me. I adore him for being so talented and yet so, well, ‘normal’! And he is about two hours away from where I am right now… Darn!

ps: This post needs a small correction… I don’t think I’d like to meet Mayer… ever. You know how sometimes you imagine a certain person to be a certain way… and after spending some time together you realise you were better off without the reality check? I’d leave it at that… This way, I just keep liking him!

Watch how the expressions change! And the little one is pure evil! “Ouch! Ouuuch!! AAAAHH!”

I started blogging around three years ago, but had to stop because I was getting addicted to updating my page everyday. I liked the control it gave me over what I said and I enjoyed the attention I got from my fellow bloggers. I guess most bloggers are in it for the apparent fame and acceptance that comes with blogging. At a certain level, we’re all vain. Internet served a medium to get to as many people as I could dream of. And once you’ve established yourself in the blogosphere, you’re the only one stopping yourself. I loved the power the written word gave me, not that I always used it wisely, I did have my moments of weakness where I said things for personal reasons, but this time round, its different.

I’ve decided to go back to blogging because I wanted to express myself. For me, the smallest of things can trigger long moments of silent contemplation, and now that I have a lot of time on hand, this tendency seems to be on an all time high. I am aware of the fact that not many people look at the world like I do… that has been apparent for a while now. Also, there is no other human being, besides yourself, who can understand or accept you entirely the way you are. No friend, no boyfriend, no girlfriend and no parents. Its almost like each individual only understands a certain part of you… Quiet like high school. You’re being made to study all these different subjects, but you don’t necessarily understand or care about most? That’s how most of us are. We don’t understand most things about most people. But there are certain trends we begin to recognize with experience. Religion and how it impacts and influences the world, world politics and how countries are perceived not on the basis of what the citizens think, but what the ruling Government decides, cultures and how most people around the world are very similar in the set of basic emotions they experience and yet, made out to be so dramatically different under the garb of external forces like religion, practice and beliefs.

Most things around us are simple. Almost everything we do or see, has a very basic motive it can be broken down to. But somewhere, while we were busy getting caught up in the rhetoric of things, we lost touch with the simplicity of life. We complicate things because we like pushing ourselves to see how far we can go with living in shades of grey. We like to believe that things are out of reach because life is so complicated. We draw comfort from the fact that we haven’t achieved all those things that we set out to because, well, life kept screwing it up for us. But deep down we know most problems are temporary, we know ALL circumstances change no matter how miserable it feels at the time. And we know that we can get away by fooling the world about it because, well, most people don’t understand most things about most people anyway.

Trying to figure how wordpress works. Regular blog posts will resume once technology has been mastered!